••• Monday, November 08, 2004

Dawn of the Knitting Dead: The Final Chapter
While an inebriant-induced spittle dangled precariously from her chin, her rum-numbed fingers worked a clumsied frenzy, in a valiant effort to close the deal.

Examining the completed garter square of oatish hue, her eyes welled with tears of rapture. And relief. And overwhelm. ::And perhaps just a smidge of disgust at the flatulent flavor of the month wafting from the Shit Eating Wonder. Briefly she recalled the turds of Novembers past. Frosty and firm. Yet, no freezer burn. But she digresses.::

The depth of the implication for finishing the mealy-mouthed piece was beyond her immediate fathom. "Irony," she mumbled, as she swiped the square at the rope of saliva, which now connected her chin to a breast. Ironic, how one simple garter square could at once symbolize unwavering love and commitment to the man of her dreams and also be her ticket to ride away.
From him.
To Lansing.
On Saturday.
To see the T-Bears.
And Amy.
And a book.
And some yarn.
And another book.
And some more yarn.

It was a thrill to meet Amy in person. She’s as great a treat as you’d imagine. Friendly and approachable, in an up-front, sassy kind of way. After signing my book, she helped me find yarn for the Heart Scarf from the Knitty October Surprise edition, and agreed to let me take her picture, which I did only after apologizing for being such a dorkass "Fudgy." ::Side note: "Fudgy" is Michiganspeak for obnoxious tourist types. And Amy even knew what it was without explanation. I was unsurprised. 'Cause she's cool like that.

Knitty designer Jillian Moreno was there too, but I didn’t have the Fudgeballs to ask her for a picture 'cause I was still reeling dorklike from the previous request.

But here's a totally spontaneous and impromptu photo of Amy and me, taken by a stranger who somehow managed to steal my camera, get in a sneaky shot, develop a sudden allergic reaction to air, drop the camera and run from the store, gasping for alternative breathing sources. Which means that I was not so lameass dorkfudged to ask a perfect stranger to take a posed-to-look-candid shot of Amy and me. So there.

I did meet some other cool people, but, as you can see from the picture, their names and faces are kind of a blur.

I am very busy this week with parent/teacher conferences at my place of employment, plus all the usual mini-sessions. Later in the week I'll provide more details on purchases and some thoughs on the Knitwits book.

Until then, I'll leave you with a Pearl a la Cakers.

On the way home from the grocery store recently, we were telling Cakers that we had to hurry because Cheddar had to be let out to go potty. To which she replied, "Yeah, and he probably has his paw in his butt, right now."


Note: This post has not enjoyed my usual obsessive perusal for error. And the first few paragraphs are intentionally bad. And wrong. And wronger.

Say Goodnight Gracie....

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