Well, we’re on the back half of our week plus of vacation, and, truthfully, I’m about ready to go home, because:

It’s been really, really hot.

We’ve had some glorious times.

Too much glory, in a short period of time, can burn out the retinas of your soul.

It’s been really, really hot.

I miss my air conditioning.

My husband has been working throughout this vacation, and when you’re the parents of a three year-old, and on vacation, but one of you is not really on vacation, no one is on vacation.

I miss feeling like I don’t have to worry about feeling like I’m on vacation when I really don’t feel like I’m on vacation.

I’m tired of applying sunscreen.

I’m tired of scraping off sunscreen.

I’m tired of squeezing in and out of my fabulous Land’s End Waterside Breast Management System, several times a day. By the third time, it's like trying to put two squeezes back into the toothpaste tube.

I’m tired of that stretch of pond scum in the middle my back, seemingly unfazed by current cottage water pressure.

I miss my water pressure.

I miss doing laundry and dishes and wondering if my husband is ever going to finish this job, from within the comfort of my own, air-conditioned home.

I’m tired of feeling bitchy and whiny in such a beautiful place.

I miss feeling bitchy and whiny from witin the comfort of my own home.

I miss my cat.

I miss my wireless. (hah)

My in-laws are coming.

I miss missing my in-laws.

We’ve had some glorious times, but too much of that shit can really get on an inherently crabby person’s nerves.

Pre-Post-Vacation Ponderings
S’mores. So, what the hell is up with this shit? Did we just pretend to love them, as young campers? Was it to appease our counselors? Did we hope the graham-mallow combo would compensate for not brushing our teeth for days on end? Was it a case of The Emperors New Dessert, where everyone just convinced themselves that it tasted good?

So, after gagging on re-visiting this childhood nostalgia, I have concluded the following:

1) Marshmallows belong only in combination with Rice Krispies, hot cocoa or pistachio pudding.

2) Graham crackers belong only sandwiched around left over cake frosting, under cheese cake or dipped in cold milk.

3) The use of a perfectly good Hershey bar in this vile concoction is not only a perverse waste of chocolate, it should be prosecutable.

Catch a Skeeter By the Toe


Have you ever tried this stuff? What a joke. By the time you catch the damn thing, get someone to hold it down, so you can wipe it, you’ll have been bitten by seven of his angry friends. To say nothing of the mid- procedural mortality rate.

Well....I had a bunch more to bitch upon say, but my husband just returned from a trip to town, and announced that the job he's been working on is currently on its way to the customer, via overnight express. And that he's now free to enjoy the last two days of vacation.

Well, yea!

So, later.
Much.

P.S. Okay, about the s'mores. Does anyone really like these things? Really. I need to know.

Labels: Cottage, Now You're Whining, What the Hell and Oh Yea