I only had one New Year’s resolution for this year, which was to find and remove the last of the pencils from under my boob. But then I came across this woman,and changed my mind. Now, she gets boobs.

Be sure to check out her other blog, which is alleged to be more chatty. And her Christmas Day post is a must read. You can almost smell the boozey breath of the carolers in the park. Oh yeah, and her profile. Read her profile.

Back so soon?
Okay! Okay!

You Say You Wanna Resolution?
I never could do the New Year resolution thing. It's not entirely due to my possessing the attention span of a flea. And neither is it directly related to the fact that I am so oppositional, I routinely defy myself. ::An ex-beau once called me Terminally Oppositional. Quite a compliment, coming from a clinical psychologist. Later, I wondered if he wasn't on some level, wishing me dead. I always preferred to think of myself as Fiercely Independent.::

What I don't like about resolutions is that they are not human-friendly. Being human is a process. Every day of living brings a new thought or perspective, on something. No day, in the life of a human, is exactly the same as another. Resolutions, however, are not fluid, or process-oriented. Resolutions are rigid. Resolute. Even.

One year, I made a pitiful attempt to incorporate the New Years resolution with human process, as follows: Starting January 1, I will no longer be fettered by the corollary implications of being a self-serving, lazy, redundant, brazen boozer and part-time strumpet. I was back in therapy by the ides of February.

I like Stacey Joy's idea, of an annual plan. While she didn't necessarily say that her plan would be in lieu of a New Year's resolution, I really like the idea of a New Year Plan. A plan is process. Fluid. Malleable. In fact, it can be written into a New Year Plan that the Plan can be cancelled at any time. ::Makes for a nice soft landing, when falling off the commitment wagon.::

We're On the Segue to Hell
I just barely made it into the new, cool, year-long meme thangy (i.e. guaranteed post material, at least once every two weeks) The ABC Along*. For those knot in the know, it's about the ABC's. And pictures. You can read all about it at Anne's blog.

This week's picture is sponsored by the letter A.

A is for Acceptance.



Over the past year, I have had a difficult time accepting the changes in my body, brought on by middle age. For several months, with the assistance of my best friend Denial, I was able to cling to the hope that one day I will get back into my favorite jeans, which are two sizes smaller than my current ass.

Even after adjusting for size, I continue to shop for clothes with my old, er, former body shape in mind. I guess I still see myself as that girl. But the styles that once became me, now betray me. It's not a good look. These are the things I must accept. Unfortunately, my closet is still filled with the clothes of Denial, which means that most days I go to work looking either skank or frump.

Therefore, Marcy's New Year Plan for 2006 will be about Acceptance. I will not only accept and embrace my plumper, juicy ass, I will also dress her up in the finest, most stylin' of garb.

From now on my pants will be boot cut. And worn with belts, with shirts tucked in. (I can't do the shirttails hanging under the short sweater thing. I always worry that I'll accidently tuck them in, after using the toilet. And how embarrassing would that be? I can't even think about it.::

I'm going to redefine my look, in a style befitting both my personality and my new bod.

::Okay, I'm really tired and put way too much pressure on myself to get this post out, tonight. But I will, dang it.::

The bottom line is that the vibrant, sexy, stylin' young thang that I thought I used to be, is still here, somewhere. I need to pick her up and dust her off and give her a big smooch.

Then take her shopping.

And maybe someone should do us all a favor, and drop a hint along the same line, to Mariah Carey? I mean, did anyone see her New Year's eve getup? It looked like a little something she picked up at Tonya Harding's last garage sale.

And, so ya know, I'll probably be cutting back to two posts a week for a while.** Things are hopping at work and home. And I still have to get to studying for that big test.

A is for Aye Really Tired. G'night.

*I'll post the ABC webring thangy later this week. Dude. It's late.

**With the same number of commas.

Edit Note: This post was edited 7am, Thursday, for your reading comfort. I am now late for work. I'll probably be fired, which means there will be lots more commas in all your respective futures.

Labels: ABC, Boobs and Pee and Poo, With Grace My Ass