••• Monday, October 02, 2006

Hi-Ho, Hi-Ho.... 

...I got some Effin-O.
I knit real swell,
Then seamed like hell,

The Caker's Queen of Hearts:

Here's a shot that shows a little more of its natural texture:

I'da loved to have shown a Cakers actually wearing it, but she was in one of her "I ain't your Monkey" moods and wouldn't put it on for the camera. It does look cute on her.
Pattern: Queen of Hearts, from A Treasury of Rowan Knits

Yarn: Brown Sheep, Cotton Fleece. In Some Kind of Green.

Comments: What the hell took you so long? That poor girl is prit near grown!
Okay, is there anybody out there who just can't get enough of the mattress stitch? ::Raises hand::.

I'm not kidding. I love the mattress stitch.

I have it in my head that finishing a sweater is about as joyful a chore as getting an oral colonic.

Therefore, per usual, I had the knitting on this sweater done weeks before the final construction.

And, per usual, once I finally got to the finish line, I wound up falling in love with the mattress stitch, all over again.

I don't know what it is, but this thing, it mesmerizes.
It holds some kind of secret power over me. So that once I start, I don't want to stop.

I don't want to talk.
I don't want to work.
I just want to bang on the seam on all day.

A regular Mary Mattress Stitch I am.

Unfortunately, all good mattress banging must come to an end.

But somehow, I didn't feel quite finished, so I dug through my pile of knitting-crap-to-take-care-of, and came up with this:

All it needed was a zipper. Even with Bonne Marie's lovely tutorial, sewing a zipper cannot hold a brand-clean colonic hose to my mighty mattress stitch.

That sweater actually looks better in person than in the picture. Well, except for the part you can't see in the picture, where the left side of the cardie is longer than the right. This is a problem that becomes a real problem when putting in a zipper. To say nothing to the fact that the sweater itself was born on the wrong side of ugly.

Yes, it's a little ugly. But it's my little ugly. I think it will be great for a fall stroll or hayride, or neighborhood dogfight.

I'd provide specs but I can't remember the yarn. It's Bernat something. Flesh of Fish ,or something like that. Discontinued, of course. The pattern was from Vogue Knitting, Fall 2004.

I had a hideously ass-kickin-busy-but-nothing-to-show-for-it-at-the-end-of-the-day kind of day. And I'm tired. And I gotta go.

Both my babies have birthdays this week, so on top of being quite the FO Ho', I'm wearing my brain cells to a nub, pondering the passage of time and the growing up of babies fine.

I actually have even more knitting to update, plus an FO of another variety. But now I'm feeling like that guest who says she's leaving, but merely lingers at the door, obsessively finishing every new thought on saying good bye.

So I'm just going to do it.
I'm hanging up.

Oh, that reminds me. Did I ever tell you about my ex-boyfriend Tad? About the time we were on the phone, and he kept talking and talking and talking and I accidentally bumped my chin on the hang-up button and hung us up but he didn't even know I wasn't there and I couldn't call him back because it was busy because he was on the phone?

Okay, I got it. On the count of three, we both hang up. All right? At the same exact time. One, two, two and a half...


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