I started writing this post last week Sunday, while still in my jammies and operating under the mistaken belief that I had an entire afternoon yawning before me.

It's amazing how quickly a yawn of an afternoon can turn into a gasp and then a choke. Then, between a week's worth of work things, home things and internetz-distraction-things,the knife ran away with the spoon.

Let Me Invitate You
My sister and I are throwing my niece a wedding shower June 14, which means the invitations needed to go out this week. During the preliminary planning discussion, it was decided that it would be a quite cute and clever if we ::me:: were to make the invitations,using my niece’s “Save the Date” picture. ::It’s a family curse, this Need to Make Things One Can Much More Easily Buy From the Store Without Anyone Giving A Rat’s Ass::

My original plan was to keep it simple. Plain card. The picture. Simple matting. Lovely Script. Done and Doner.

However, the only digital sample my niece had was tiny size, so when I resized it to fit the card her pixels were showing. ::The kind of thing she should save for the honeymoon, really.::

Next thing you know I’m over at Big Huge Labs, in search of the perfect solution. And the entire time I'm foto fiddling over there, I'm thinking to myself,Why am I doing this,when I can just go to the store tomorrow,buy some invitations, put them in the mail and nobody will give a rat’s ass?.

And then I found a most excellent Big Huge Labs application combo, printed it up and made a prototype invite. Even though it was cute, it still needed a little something. Like a tiny satin bow. So I go back to the store for the bow.

And then I decided it needed a little something more. Like a pearl bead. So back to the store I go.

And then I tried to write the shower information real neat, using a tiny Sharpie bought just for this purpose. And it looked like asswrite.

And then I thought I'll just go buy some damn invitations, because, really, who will give a rat’s ass?

But instead of buying already-made invitations, I bought sheets of clear labeling material, upon which I could print the shower information, then cut it out and stick it to a card, 25 times.

But only after I accurately cropped each picture, at just the right angle, which was not a right angle, and stick it to a card, 25 times.

And then there was the ribbon sticking.

And the pearl sticking.

Two sticky days later...voila!



At one point late Saturday night, my husband came by and asked how it was going. After a whinge and a huff and a series of poor little mes, I said "This is really a pain. Especially when you consider that I could just buy some invitations, send them out, and nobody would give a rat's ass."

He nodded and said "But they are really cool. You did a nice job."

Then I looked at the pile and thought "Yeah. I did."

And the truth is, regardless of the element of pain in the assedness, I really love this stuff.

And I did do a good job.
And I give a rat's ass. That's who.

If It Weren't For Bad Knit,I'd Have No Knit at All.
A couple of weeks ago I started a pair of socks for my mother-in-law. Over the Circle of Brain weekend, I got quite a bit done and by Sunday night I had turned the heel and picked up the gussetts. Two rounds of decrease later, I found a big ol' boo-boo, from days ago. So I ripped.

I've done nothing since.

Except this:



It's a scarf I knit for my sister. For her birthday. Last year.

It's been stewing in a bag all year, awaiting a kitchener application. I finally got around to it last weekend, just in time for the two week anniversary of her most recent birthday celebration.

And to think I coulda just bought her something.

Mother's Day Intervention
Overheard at Mother's Day party:

Niece: That wine has a really strong smell.

Cakers, full drama: Oh. I know. We get that smell ALL the time, at my house. Especially by the computer.

Entire Family: Silence.

There'll be more on how to punish a 6 year-old for doing nothing wrong, later in the show.

::Edited 5/17 for typos wordos and grammos.::

Labels: Knit Done